A Lesson in Charitable Giving (from my 1st grader)

The 1st and 2nd graders at religious education class are in a battle to see who can bring in the most food in the upcoming month.  No, they aren't participating in a competitive eating contest... they're putting together donations for a backpack program for families in need.

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She Sounded like a Broken Record

My 8 year old daughter was working on her homework and jibber-jabbing something while she worked.  It was the same thing over and over.

I just about said "You sound like a broken record." until I realized that she wouldn't have the faintest idea what that meant.

For a split second, I thought "...Like a scratched CD" but quickly nixed that for being before her time also.

"...like an .mp3 stuck on repeat?"


Sigh.

I feel old.

No Wrapping Required

I'm certain that everyone can relate to the dilemma of the trivial gift exchange, the ornament exchange or the Secret Santa.  You know... extended family, friends, neighbors, coworkers, groups you belong to and more.  So many people try to keep it trivial as in "You can't spend more than $5" while others keep it simple by making it a white elephant exchange.  It's all stuff.

And while I appreciate that it is all about the thought, I'm trying to get out of the habit of acquiring stuff that I don't need.  I'm trying to change my mindset and get rid of things when I'm emotionally ready to do so.

So when a member of Collective Bias inquired if anyone wanted to do a Secret Santa or an Ornament Exchange, I politely declined.  Instead, I offered up an alternative.  How about a virtual exchange where we take a little time to get to know a fellow member and share a little about that person.  After all, it doesn't cost anything, doesn't need to be wrapped, doesn't require shipping, doesn't leave a carbon footprint and it doesn't add clutter to a closet.

One member coordinated it and assigned each of us a colleague.  I was lucky enough to draw Eliza of Home Mom 3 who I didn't realize was so diverse!  In addition to The Life of a Home Mom, she writes for Tom Cruise Watch and Sales Weekly both of which she started in 2008 and Babies in the News which is a little younger.

But how did she get her start and when?  Well, Eliza has been freelancing for years and put roots into her blog in 2005 when she logged on to tell about the gifts her daughter received for her birthday.  Her blog has evolved in the years since that to include everything from Wordless Wednesday photo posts to giveaways to more personal stories. 

Why did she start blogging?  Well, Eliza was the wife of a deployed soldier - making her fill the role of both mom and dad.  Her blog was a way to share their life from afar.  (BTW - Mr. HomeMom3, Thank you for all the years of service you gave to our country.)

I've known Eliza for quite a while.  If I recall correctly, she was among my first blog friends.  She's one of those bloggers who leaves comments because she feels moved to... because she cares... and not because she's trying to improve the stats on her own blog.  She's someone who is a friend of mine on Facebook that I actually enjoy chatting with!  And she's among the people I look forward to meeting in person someday.

In order to participate in this roast, we were asked for some tidbits about ourselves and Eliza shared that she's inspired by frogs.  Actually, she specifically said "I believe my "muse" is a 6ft tall frog, at the age of 26 I went out and got a tattoo of a frog on my right shoulder blade. He looks very much like the WB frog but in a jester's outfit."  Frogs have been her thing since she was a kid.  Good thing, because with all the leaping and jumping that she's had to do as the mom of 4 and military wife, she's needed the role model!

Merry Christmas, Eliza.  You're a great blogger and a wonderful person.  I'm proud to call you my colleague but even happier to call you my friend.

Holding Hands 45 Years Later

Dear Mom and Dad - 

It's funny the things that stick in your head...

When I was in high school, I remember sitting at a wrestling meet at North Scott High School.  Donna D. and I were hanging out, chatting in-between matches when she said something that I think of often.  I don't recall the exact words but it was something like this:

"Your parents are so cute.  Look at them. They still hold hands."

We looked at the two of you from a distance and watched as you held hands while sitting next to each other on the bleachers.  You would chat and smile.  Donna and I talked about how obvious it was that you were still so much in love with each other.

That was some 25 years ago but I have no doubt that Donna and I could have that exact same conversation today.

At Don and Sandi's 50th wedding anniversary party, Sandy told me that we were one of the most memorable couples they had for marriage preparations.  Mainly because of something I said to her during those sessions. She asked me what I wanted in a marriage and my response was "I want one like my mom and dad."  Certainly I don't recall saying it but I absolutely can hear myself saying it.  It's something that I've felt for a long time... maybe spurred by the conversation Donna and I had so many years before that.

If there's one thing you've done, it's to be models for a loving relationship.  You hold hands, joke and giggle like a couple of newlyweds.

It's wonderful having parents who are still in love 45 years after they got married!

Happy 45th Anniversary.

Are You Done Yet?

When I was in high school, my parents gave me the benefit of participating in Project Close Up.  Aside from the government related things that I expected to learn, I attained one valuable piece of etiquette.  As we prepared to eat one of the meals, I vaguely remember being told the proper way to indicate (for the servers) when we were done with our meal.

With this being a holiday weekend and a lot of people eating out or away from home, I thought it would be nice to share this. (Let's just hope I am remembering correctly.)

When you are done eating, place your knife on your plate, then cross the tip of the fork over the top of the knife, with the tines facing down.

More or less like I displayed in this picture... sometimes I end up with the handles a bit closer or off to the side.  It all depends on whether there is food in the way, of course.

After searching Google, I haven't been able to find any pictures online. I read some posts that indicated to cross the utensils when done and one post that said you place both utensils side by side on the plate to indicate you're done.  But no pictures. 

Crossing them is how I remember it and this is what I always do.  More often than not the server will either just take my plate away without interrupting my conversation or will say "Let me get that out of your way."  It's much nicer than hearing "Are you done with that?" or "Are you still working on that?"

First, I'm curious if servers are taught to watch for utensil placement. I would also love to hear if I have remembered it correctly all these years later!  And if I have... do they teach this any more?

Happy Easter!

A New Slant on Technology

We know we're turning our kids into techno-geeks when we go to a fast food restaurant, get them a drink to share and hear this:

Let's do two-player!

But it gets even better...

Last week, I was playing with Miss K when she said pointed to the area she had designated as the play area and told me "Don't go off the screen."

The following day, while playing Littlest Pet Shop dolls with the girls, Miss M needed to run upstairs for something. She waived her hand over the play area and, without missing a beat, requested that we "Pause the game" until she got back.

Can't wait to hear what they come up with next.

So We Teach the Kids to Cheat

First, I want to say thank you to anyone who voted for me to win the HP TouchSmart computer. In case you didn't see the comments attached to the prior post, the contest was deemed null and void and nobody won.

It was quite a messy thing, actually. The nature of the contest - the voting process - is designed to encourage viral marketing. Spread the word to help a friend out. Post everywhere you can think of in order to garner the most votes. The front runner when the contest was closed has a large fan base on YouTube as well as the backing of his gaming community. A few of us were working various Mom Blogging communities, Craigslist, various hobby forums and other networks. I even found out that my brother put in a plea to his business associates just so I would “owe him” if I happened to win. If you’re a sibling, you totally understand the notion of holding something over another siblings head.

Unfortunately, the problem with such voting programs is there isn't any real control over the actual votes. Hackers can do anything and blog widgets like these don’t exactly have Fort Knox security built in. So guess what happened... there was vote tampering. The guy who was in the lead had people openly bragging about having voted for him multiple times with one even offering to show others how easy it is. To make matters worse, it was discovered that someone (or multiple people) were running scripts to hike the votes. HighTechDad was able to easily locate and remove 2000 votes from the guy in the lead but he didn't run through it with a fine tooth comb. But before he even had a chance to do so, his site was hammered by an automated system that not only shut down his site but caused his service provider to suspend his account altogether. Basically, he declared the guy in front to be the winner and within minutes, the attack on his site halted. After reviewing additional information and the subsequent cease-fire once he announced the winner, he decided the contest was null and void. Although I would have preferred to win it, I'm glad that it ended the way it did rather than the front runner unduly being given the prize.

I hated that people were cheating, but what bothered me most is that it was being done by kids. When HighTechDad announced the winner (and the site attack stopped), it pretty much showed those kids that yes, cheaters could still win. Although the guy in the lead may or may not have been involved in the cheating didn't really matter. The fact that people... kids... cheated on his behalf just set a bad example. When he saw those kids bragging about it, he should have blasted them. Blocked them as friends. Publicly scolded them. Contacted their parents if he knew how. Taught them a lesson in values and ethics.

Although I would have preferred a charity receive this in lieu of nobody, I'm glad HighTechDad opted NOT to show kids that it's okay to cheat... or even to stand for someone cheating on your behalf. Regardless of whether you were aware of it or not.

If I had to do it all again...

I don't consider myself one to get writer's block but I do get overwhelmed and find that I just do not make time for writing. Today, however, I'm writing a letter to my younger self. Why? Well, I could say that it's because I'm inspired by the holidays... but that wouldn't be entirely honest. I'm actually entering a contest at Chocolate Covered Daydreams where someone will win a Wii Fit Plus. It's not a random drawing, but is being judged. Of course, I'm hoping that all the winner will be me but this contest had an unexpected outcome. Once I started composing the letter in my head, I realized it was pretty therapeutic. I went back and changed my letter entirely. With that, here's my letter to my younger self:

===================================
Dear teenage Nicole,

What would you think if I said that 25 years from now, you'll be married to a fantastic man, have two beautiful daughters, have seen some wonderful places and be retired? As you look around, that doesn't seem very realistic, does it? You feel unpopular, ugly and sad. But I'm here to tell you that it's all true. It will happen if you stay on the right path.

You're going through a rough time, I know. I remember. But seriously, it's really not as bad as it seems. The braces will come off and you'll shed the glasses for contacts. You'll do great in school, too. Believe it or not, you WILL eventually have a boyfriend. You'll smile with confidence and make people feel at ease around you.

But I'm not going to say everything is rosy. The hard truth is that you'll find more difficulties in the future, too. Depression, an eating disorder, financial strains, infertility and depression (again) to name a few. But you'll get through it and you'll come out stronger on the other side. Alongside your husband, you'll become financially savvy. Your children will make you feel old and young at the same time. You'll see some family members leave way before their time and others live to see great-grandchildren.

Just keep a few things in mind:
- You're not perfect. Nobody is.
- You won't have the perfect life. Nobody does.
- Realize there's a difference between being hard on yourself and beating yourself up.
- You're a good person, even when you are at your lowest.
- You'll have some friends who stand with you and help you... you'll have others who use you and abandon you.
- Experience will show you that life is not fair. Some people lie and cheat to get ahead while others work hard just to make ends meet. You will get passed over for job promotions but something better will come along if you maintain a positive attitude.

It all works out eventually.

When I started this letter, I had every intention of telling you YES, apply for West Point or Harvard like you (will) consider. But then I realized that the decisions you're about to make... that I DID make... got US to where we are now. And if I had to do it all over again, I would. The same way. With all the mistakes, hardships and all.

I'll close this letter by simply saying "Hang in there. Just keep your chin up and have hope because good things happen to good people."

Sincerely,
A much older, much wiser and much more confident you.

To the Bettendorf Box Scrounge

Dear Box Scrounge in Bettendorf,

I woke up this morning to find cardboard strewn across my driveway. Thank you very much for putting your need for boxes over the clean way I attempted to recycle my cardboard.

You see, that very nice huge box that you took was holding all my other recyclable cardboard. When you took that box, you left behind an unsightly, unorganized mess. Thankfully, there weren't strong winds last night carrying my cardboard all across the neighborhood.

If you were in need of boxes, you could have come during the daylight hours, knocked on my door and asked. I would have said "Sure, I know what it's like to need boxes during a move or cleanup project." I probably would have even logged onto the local Craigslist and done a search for moving boxes. Then I would have given you my boxes and found another way to keep my cardboard organized for the recycling man.

If you found it necessary to take boxes in the middle of the night, you could have at least had the courtesy to bring twine along and clean up the mess you left behind.

What ever happened to common sense?

Sincerely,
Nicole, Bettendorf resident

And that's why they closed...

DH and I decided to have lunch at Bishop's at Southpark Mall yesterday.  The last time we ate there was before we moved to California.  But I had a B1G1F coupon and Bishop's French Silk pie sounded awesome.

After we ate, we walked around the mall and were amazed at how many stores were no longer in business. I guess traffic at the mall just isn't what it used to be.

I pointed at one such store by the name of "G Spot" that was obviously empty.  Quick-witted DH responded "It probably closed because nobody could find it."

Front of the Line Fashion Sense

I couldn't put my finger on my 1st grader's funky sense of fashion lately.  I've been trying to give her some independence when it comes to selecting her outfits but I've also tried to give her a little direction.   For instance, she'll pick out a piece for the day and I'll give her suggestions about what might match it.  Don't get me wrong, I'm not a fashionista - quite the opposite.  But I try to make sure that the different pieces work together... more or less.

Well this morning, Miss M just wanted to argue with me.  She wanted THIS shirt and THAT pair of shorts.  The shirt was mostly dark pastels with purples, greens and blues with a small pattern.  The shorts a few shades of pink, yellow,  and red with large daisies and butterflies.  No matter how many times I tried to tell her that they didn't work together, she just didn't want to listen.

Then it finally came out.  The reason for her misguided fashion decisions lately...

"But Mom, I want to wear lots of colors so when the teacher calls a color I can get in the front of the line."

Sigh.  That explains so much.

How Did My Photo Get There?

During the course of the BlogHer Conference in Chicago, I took pictures with various people that I was excited to have the opportunity to meet. Celebrities, fellow bloggers, people I admire. Mel, my roomie at the event, brought a fancy film camera to BlogHer. I took several candid shots for her so she wasn't always using her film.  Following the conference, I shared all my digital photos with her and was surprised to see all of them end up on her Flickr account.  No big deal though since there wasn't anything personal, private or embarrassing.  Mostly just photographs of the event, the people and the chaos. I didn't think twice about it.

Well, imagine my surprise today when I noticed that Mel posted a message on Twitter a few days ago.

I don't know how many of you surf the BlogHer website but the masthead is a photo bar that BlogHer regularly updates with fresh photographs.  I've never considered submitting a photograph to it so I had no clue what Mel was talking about in her Tweet.  I popped over to BlogHer to find this:

The picture on the far left is me with Donna Byrd, Publisher of The Root, following a keynote presentation at BlogHer09.

Cool.

When Free Just Isn't Good Enough

In an attempt to gain some control over the effects of the recession, restaurants like IHOP have been offering special promotions.  IHOP, specifically, is offering "Kids Eat Free" where you get one free kids meal from the "Just for kids" menu with the purchase of each adult entree.

Yum, IHOP.  I decided it sounded like a good plan for dinner because, well, I didn't have anything thawed and didn't want to cook anyhow.  And IHOP was offering free dinner for the kids.  I love free.

So we headed off to IHOP, with Miss M exclaiming she wanted pancakes AND some of what Dad usually orders.  Miss K proclaiming that she only wanted what Dad usually orders.  What does DH usually order?  Country fried steak with pancakes, hashbrowns and eggs.  Think they have it on the kids menu?  We hoped so.  Did they?  Unfortunately not.

So we asked the kids what they wanted instead.  Miss M agreed to just have the chocolate smiley face pancake but Miss K stood her ground.  She can be a difficult eater and if she doesn't eat well then DH and I don't enjoy our meal.  It's frustrating, a waste of money and a pain because then she wants to eat something else when she gets home.

So we had a plan.  I would order what I wanted and get Miss M her pancakes as part of the "Kids Eat Free" program.  DH would order what he wanted and get a second entree free using a coupon from either the paper or our restaurant book.  Everyone would get what they wanted.  Sure we would end up with leftovers but that's okay because both kids would eat well and we would all enjoy the meal.

You know what they say about the best laid plans... When the server came to take our order, he said that we couldn't combine the offers.  It says so on the coupon and on the sign.  He explained that it's their policy that even if we split the check, the fact that we were at the same table prevented combining of coupons.  He was polite, but we were frustrated. 

We asked for a few minutes so Miss K could decide what she wanted and she decided she wanted Chick-Fil-A which was just two building over.  Miss M agreed.  DH knew I was in the mood for IHOP but I said to him "Yeah, but I won't enjoy my meal if she's going to be difficult."  So we agreed to leave.  We hadn't ordered anything except water at that point so IHOP wasn't out anything except our business.

But as we walked out, a gentleman (who had been seated at the booth right next to us shortly after we sat down) stopped DH to say he overheard the entire conversation.  "Good for you. It's hard enough to afford to take kids out to eat; I thought it was ridiculous that they wouldn't honor the coupon.  I left too.  I just wanted to let you know that you have my support."  So I guess IHOP was our business and his.

Yeah, I realize that IHOP has their policy, but we weren't asking for two free kids meals at the price of one entree.  We were simply trying to get the foods that the kids would eat utilizing the resources we had on hand.  If their goal is to bring in business then they need to think outside the box because if it isn't something you want, then free just isn't good enough.

...and as a bonus, Chick-Fil-A let us use two B1G1F coupons from our restaurant book.  Nice.

Are We Wasting Taxpayer Dollars?

In just a few weeks, Miss K will begin Kindergarten.  My baby.  In school.  Full time.  It's just shocking.

But I'm not concerned because I know she's ready.  We've spent a lot of time reading to her, educating her, practicing her alphabet, numbers, word recognition and (gasp) even multiplication.  But we also enrolled her in preschool for the past two years and that helped prepare her socially for school.

Her first preschool encounter was a 2-days-per-week program through one of the local churches.  She enjoyed it and I felt she was making incredible strides.  Last year, she participated in Iowa's Statewide Voluntary Preschool Program.  Many parents in Iowa aren't familiar with it so if you're not from Iowa, I would be surprised if you were.  Whenever I strike up a conversation with a stranger in say, the doctor's office waiting room, I ask if their child is enrolled.  Heck, I even asked someone at a yard sale last week to make sure they knew.  To sum it up, the state has a program where preschools can apply for grant funding to help facilitate a Kindergarten readiness program for four year old children.   The primarily purpose of the grant is help increase opportunities and access to quality preschools.  Last year, we actually transferred preschools to be able to participate in the grant.  It's not that we thought our preschool was sub-par because it was great.  It's because the grant is typically used to offset tuition.  In other words, it was free.  Yes, free.  Thank you, Iowa taxpayers for paying for my daughter's preschool education. 

Some schools put signs out advertising that their preschool program is free.  They're proud of it because it's a community service and it's win/win for the community and the school.  Preschools get increased enrollment and money to replenish supplies, update toys/equipment and improve teacher wages while on the flip side, families can welcome monetary relief especially in this economic downturn. It's a great program - mostly.  It has a few flaws that I would like to explain...

I thought it was the norm - that preschools participating in the grant utilize the grant funds to subsidize the tuition.  But I recently found out that's not always the case.  In a few very rare cases, the preschools have opted to continue to charge tuition which seriously restricts how the grant funds can be utilized.  Since you only need so many consumable items such as supplies and educational materials, that leaves salaries as one of the few remaining allowable spending slots.  In these few instances, rather than pass the savings along to the community, the teachers are lining their own pockets because (to quote one) "I did a lot of hard work to get this grant and I think I deserve it."  Having worked with grant accountants during my days as an accountant for the city I lived in, I would have been shocked to hear "I applied for this (road construction) grant so I should get a raise."

So I'm stewing and feeling like my tax dollars are being wasted on a few greedy individuals rather than spread out to provide a quality education for families who might otherwise not be able to send their child to preschool.  I don't have any control over the situation other than to inform and educate so that (hopefully) the masses will let it be known that it's NOT okay to reap wages that are 50-100% higher than their peers are getting just because they took the initiative to apply for a grant.

If you live in Iowa and have a child who will be entering Kindergarten next year (2010-2011) then it's worth checking to see if your local preschool is participating in the grant.  If your child isn't enrolled, then what are you waiting for?  Preschool is a great jump-start in preparing for Kindergarten.  However, if your school is participating in the grant AND they are STILL charging tuition, ask them how much of a pay increase they received pre-grant versus post-grant.  If it's exorbitant, go elsewhere.  Those teachers are being self-serving, utilizing the very stringent grant restrictions for their own personal benefit.  I'm certain that I wouldn't want my child being taught by someone whose primary interest in applying for a grant is so selfish.  It's a total waste of my tax dollars.  What are your thoughts?

Back from BlogHer. Wow.

I returned home yesterday from BlogHer and I'm still in shock at how amazing it was. Although I don't have any photos downloaded yet or any wonderful blog posts ready to publish, I have so many things to share that I just don't know where to start.

The event itself is like any trade show - seminars, vendors, food and swag. But at BlogHer, it's the traditional trade show on steroids. Seminars are intense and informative with fantastic peers as the moderators. The vendors had tons of information as well as product samples. There was never a lack of food around although I seldom took the time to actually stop and eat.  (I lost like five pounds at BlogHer!)

Then there's the issue of the people. Lots and lots of people. Mostly non-judgmental., mostly warm and welcoming.  Once I got my feet firmly planted, nobody ever made me feel like the small blogger than I really am. People often said they recognized my business card and "I've been to YOUR blog" and seemed sincere about it. Established bloggers offered advice about how to get to the next level in the blogging community.  The celebrities, Carson Kressley, Rick Bayless, Tim Gunn, Brooke White and Paula Deen were all unbelievably human. As I swoon about "Oh my, You're (insert name here)" and ask them to sign an autograph, they were all so kind.

BlogHer was fantastic. Unbelievable. Informative. Wonder how long before I talk myself into registering for BlogHer 2010! I bet not very long!

More to come on this site and SAHM Reviews as I organize my photos, my swag and my thoughts.

Everyone Will Do it if it is Easy

When we lived in Los Angeles, I remember how easy it was to recycle. Maybe because California is such a liberal, tree-hugging state. Or maybe the rolling blackouts and water conservation issues forever remind you that resources are limited. But one thing is for sure, recycling came easy there.

How is it so different there than here? Well, for one thing, pretty much everything could be recycled... and in the same bin. Cans, bottles, boxes, newspapers and any plastic that had that recycling triangle, no matter what the number. They were all placed together in a recycling bin that was a tad bit larger than our garbage can and picked up weekly along with our garbage. We didn't have to prep anything or sort it. Ooh, so easy. I literally had a garbage can for regular stuff and a paper bag for recyclables.  As it got full, I just dumped it in the recycle bin.

Here? Glass, cans and plastics with a "1" or "2" only. And newspapers, cardboard, magazines are separated. Granted, the recycle bin is the same size as the garbage can, but it's divided in two. We can't throw the newspapers into that half until the night before pickup because the weight is just too heavy for the divider.  What makes it worse is that it is only picked up once a month. 

It's all petty, I know, but having been exposed to the easy way of doing it just makes me want to throw up my arms and say "Why bother." However, by not participating, it's only hurting future generations and I'm not willing to let my frustrations keep me from doing the right thing.

But it was over the top this morning when our regular garbage bin was not emptied. You see, we're doing some yard cleanup and removed a bush that was unruly. The city has a yard waste recycling program but not only does it require that you purchase special bags to put everything in, but you also need to purchase a sticker for each bag that you put on the curb. Well, the bag says to only include certain things and the sticker says only certain things. Nowhere did it say an entire bush was okay so we threw it in the garbage. It isn't like we were trying to avoid paying the ticket fees because right next to the garbage can was a yard waste bag, with proper fees adhered, that wasn't even full.

So why does it get me all in an uproar? Because in Los Angeles it was so much easier. We actually had a third full-sized bin strictly for yard waste. All yard waste. In the same giant bin. You know how easy that made it when we had to prune the trees? To top it off, there weren't additional yard waste fees - it was all included in our monthly garbage pickup. I guess they realized that making it easy and economical translated to more people doing it. I recall that the last city we lived in had one of the highest participating percentages in the country. No wonder.  You could recycle almost everything and it was just a matter of putting it in the right color-coded bin.

So to wrap up this long, grumbly story... As soon as I noticed that our garbage wasn't picked up, I went out and removed the bush from the can.  I chopped it up enough to put into one of those bags then put my paid fee tag on it. I called the city and the man from public works that I talked to was kind enough to have the drivers swing back by to empty the garbage. But honestly, the whole thing really ruined my morning. Here I thought I was doing the right thing and it just bit me.

Recycling can be so easy if the cities would just do things a little differently. That is definitely one thing I miss about California.

37, 38, 39... 20!

The girls and I were sitting around and chatting after we finished eating dinner.  Somehow we got on the topic of my age (39).  Miss K said "You were 37 before your last birthday."  I said "No, what comes before 39?"  She said "38 but you were 37 before that."  I confirmed what she said and told her good job.  Then I asked "So what will I be next year?" 

Miss K knows her numbers but for some reason, she's told me this before and I've decided I like it.  She enthusiastically responded "20!"  Miss M graciously intervened and said "No, 40 comes after 39." 

I'll stick with Miss K's birthday counting practices... I'll turn 20 on my next birthday.  Hope she still remembers it next April.

Where Does the Time Go?

I'm not sure what has happened to all of my free time.  Each day starts and each day ends and in the middle I feel like I'm getting nothing accomplished.  My mornings start with getting Miss M ready for school then I try to hit the gym for an hour.  Lunchtime means getting Miss K ready for school then I have an hour or so while she's gone before I need to run to pick her up.  Once the kids are home... well, we all know what THAT is like.

It's really not a bad thing, I guess.  I'm not getting anything accomplished because I've changed my priorities a bit.  Miss K is constantly craving attention and asking for someone to play with while Miss M is at school.  For quite some time, I was spending so much time on my blogs that I didn't make time to play with her.  She's four and has plenty of toys that she can play independently with.  But she wasn't very happy every time I said "Maybe later" or "Not right now".  I could see her little heart break when her "Plitty Please" requests went unanswered. 

Lately, I've tried to be a better mom and dedicate more time to her each day.  Sometimes she'll help me with cleaning, but more often than not it's what she wants to do. It's either a game, coloring or something like Polly Pocket or Barbie... but we do it together and I try to make sure she knows that I'm not ignoring her.  Next year she'll be in Kindergarten all day and I'll have plenty of time on my hands.

Instead, for now, I'm ignoring my blogs a little.  I pop online and check my email several times a day and work on draft posts for my review blog.  But I'm actually behind on that also.  I enter a contest here or there (and actually won a big one that I can't discuss on this blog because I think it violates the BlogHerAd agreement).  I've worked hard to establish some great contacts for my review blog so I need to keep it up but family needs to come first.

I try to keep my blog positive and upbeat but I haven't been able to put it together.  There's so much I have running through my head that I want to talk about, but sitting at the computer for only a few minutes at a time just isn't enough to get the thoughts on virtual paper without sounding all muffled.  But honestly, muffled is how my thoughts feel these days.

So for now, I'll play with Miss K and blog when I can.  I just hope my friends will all still be here reading when I finally get my groove back.  Please bear with me while I find my footings... I'll post when I can and hopefully that will be a little more regularly one of these days. 

Tracking Your Spending

In this time of spending concern, we're all thinking twice about many of our purchases.  A lot of people are putting off purchases of larger items.  But is that really the solution for you?  How do you know where to cut back if you don't really know where your money is going?

I'm a huge advocate of using financial software like MS Money.  As part of a review tour through BlogHer, I had the opportunity to discuss this in more detail along with talk about the new Spend Analyzer that Discover launched. 

I encourage you to read "I Spend HOW much on Fast Food?" at SAHM Reviews to find out how DH and I started on our path to financial accountability as well as some scoop about the Discover's Spend Analyzer!  It's honest and true and it's not a sales pitch so please stop by and read it...

Is a Goldfish Considered Bribery?

Yesterday at the gym, they had a table set up doing dental screenings for children.  My girls were quite excited to get brand-spanking new toothbrushes.  They act like they never get a new toothbrush!  I digress... As I was talking to the woman who set up the table, I noticed a stuffed Nemo as part of her display.  I laughed and as I recounted the goldfish story to her, I realized that I hadn't shared it on my blog yet.

Oh, where to start?

How about before Christmas.  Yup.  That's a good place to start.

Miss M wasn't even 6 yet and Miss K had just turned 4.  Our family dentist said that children can't brush their teeth effectively until they are much, much older.  So what I do is let the girls brush first then I follow up with my more thorough approach.

Brushing our teeth has always been a natural part of our bedtime routine.  But for some odd reason, probably chaotic schedules, morning brushing hasn't exactly been a priority.  Yeah, that's my fault but when I'm busy and running around trying to get Miss M ready for school while juggling getting myself and Miss K ready for the gym, I tend to get a bit flustered.  As many times as I would ask them to go brush their teeth by themselves in the morning, they seldom would.  "Tsk, tsk, Nicole.  They're only 5 and 4 - what on earth would compel you to believe they would do it on their own?"

In the meantime, someone besides me decided that the girls needed goldfish.  Probably because every time we went to WalMart they wanted to go look at all the fish.  Didn't matter what they saw in the tank, they always got excited.

Add another thing to my to-do list, but okay... if it will make them happy then I'm game.

Then came Christmas.  DH and I purchased matching beginner bowl sets for the girls.  They were cute and even came with rocks and a plant.  When we returned from Christmas out of town, the girls were allowed to go to WalMart and pick one goldfish each.  The were delighted. 
When we got home, DH set a few rules. 
One - the girls need to help clean the tanks once a week.  (He's been the parent in charge of cleaning every time except a few so hooray for DH!) 
Two - the fish cannot be fed until the beds are made and the teeth are brushed. 

The girls agreed without any complaint.  No longer do I need to beg them or remind them to brush their teeth in the morning... they usually remind ME!  Sometimes on weekends, I have to ask them if they've made their beds yet and brushed their teeth because "Your fish is waiting for breakfast."  That's not bad considering I don't usually have to remind them during the week.

Here we are in March and the fish are still alive. 

Basically, it cost us 40 cents to get the kids in the habit of brushing their teeth twice a day.  And the fact that they make their beds in the morning as part of the deal is just a bonus.

Have you bribed your kids lately?